Why Marriages don’t Last
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Why Marriages Don’t Last?
The Tipper Gore and Al Gore breakup has risen important issues of late divorces, or commonly called “cold divorces”. The case study reflected that long-term relationships may end, jeopardizing the earlier beliefs that reflected that long term marriages are always stable. The article will briefly review the reasons for why long-term marriages end in divorces. Although the Gore’s did not reveal the reason for their breakup, they mentioned it was a well-thought decision, and there were no regrets or hurt feelings amongst them. Further, there were no allegations or emotional outbursts amongst such individuals. The Gore breakup typically symbolized a “cold divorce” (Rappaport, 2013, 353-377).
Contrary to the belief that “hot divorces” are predominantly more, “cold divorces” are also taking their share in the changing socio-economic scenario. Hot divorces are defined as divorces that occur after two to seven years of marriage. Such breakups are attributed to the differences in attitudes and lifestyle of either of the spouses. Further, such breakups also occur due to the challenge of rearing children and unequal sharing of responsibilities of either counterpart. The stress and legal hassles of early breakups are lesser due to lower bonding with different family members and with family friends (Shoshana, 1993).
On the other hand people avoided breakups after spending decades together due to adjustments, increased toleration towards each other, bonded together through children and grandchildren, fear of retaliation from family members and common friends.
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However, such relations were not considered to be imposed on either spouse, and it was a spontaneous approach. On the other hand, certain socio-economic issues imposed long-term relationships, like financial dependency, cultural practices and religious beliefs (Rapoport, 2005, p2).
The societal and socio-economic scenario all across the globe is witnessing radical changes. With newer advances in medical science and technology, longevity has increased all over the globe. Thus the expected time of toleration, of constrained relationships, has also increased. Therefore, each of the partners is taking matured decisions to become separated from their family and societal commitments have been delivered. In such situations neither the children nor the family members are impacted. In fact a research indicated that people who are older felt more stress from a diseased state than breakup issues. The research clearly portrays that sexual, emotional and physical dependency on either partner’s decreases if financial, or healthcare security is not jeopardized. This situation is more prominent in people who are aged (Rappaport, 2013, 353-377).
The next issue of divorce after long-term marriages are occurring as a matter of ego clashes and personality. It was reflected long back that marriages should take place between equal classes. However, at that time class was judged by the economical and societal reputation of each family. With the change in cosmopolitan citizenship, inter-caste marriages do occur, and relationships are fairly stable. However, career progression and financial independence may create a class difference between the educated couples too. Once again this fact challenges the earlier findings, where education was considered a positive factor in long-term marriages (Riley, 2010, B1).
From the above discussion, it may be concluded that divorces may happen equally amongst the naive/newly married couples and between couples who have enjoyed fairly long term relationships. There may be a plethora of deciding factors which results in divorce, but the central theme for holding onto relationships is toleration that should be developed through love and affection (Riley, 2010, B1).
References
Riley, N. (2010). “Love conquers all. Except religion”. The Washington Post (Washington,
DC). pp. B1
Rappaport, S. (2013). “Deconstructing the Impact of Divorce on Children”. Family Law
Quarterly, 47 (3): 353–77
Rapoport, Y. (2005). “Marriage, Money and Divorce in Medieval Islamic
Society”. Cambridge University Press. p. 2
Shoshana, G. (1993). On the Economics of Marriage – A Theory of Marriage, Labor and
Divorce. Boulder, CO: Westview Press
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